Oh boy. The Shinjuku Robot Restaurant, one of the most garish and expansive fixtures in Kabukicho, is a well-known attraction both to foreigners and locals alike. It is definitely one of the options to go to for a visit, and with how it looks from afar and the giant signs it's very difficult to miss. I actually enjoyed my time there, but I can tell you that it's not for everyone.
A bit of a disclaimer: this post is going to be a bit different. I think my experience with the Robot Restaurant was quite intriguing, so I didn't really have the thought to take any photos of my time there; I only took videos, and I can only post one video. I'll have to use images from the internet to help you imagine what I saw, and I'll be describing things in as much detail as I can. I'll be crediting those images to their proper sources so that you can check those other sites out. With that out of the way, let me tell you how my experience went!
Some friends I went to high school with were visiting Tokyo at the time, and we had just gone to a nightclub the night before, so were still feeling the effects of staying out until the first train home. A day or so ago, we had reserved our tickets to check out the restaurant online after seeing a large billboard advertisement. We made our way through the streets of Kabukicho to where the tickets for the show were being sold to pick up our tickets. The box office was across the street from the official face of the show, where two retired "robots" were on display.
It took a while to get the tickets, but the pick-up seemed to go relatively smoothly. I say "seemed to" because I didn't actually pick up the tickets. I stood outside the box office and waited for the friend that ordered the tickets while the line grew to extend to the street outside. I was told there were some hiccups in communication, and they initially had trouble finding the name the tickets were under.
We entered the building across the street with our tickets. We were led through some dimly lit tunnels and out the back of the building. The staff guided us across an alleyway and to a third building, where another staff member operated the elevator. We rode the elevator up to an incredibly tacky waiting area equipped with garish furniture, bright lights, and dizzying mirror panelling. Drinks were available at two bars in this room, although they were at a hefty price, even for a Japanese bar.
We decided not to partake in any of the refreshments, and I marvelled at the disorienting decor of the waiting room. After a few moments, I noticed a full grand piano sitting on a small stage at the far corner of the room with a drum kit and some electric guitars set up behind it. I initially thought these were just for show; I thought they were set pieces to add to the air of pretentious tackiness of the room. I was wrong though, as (a man dressed up as) a robot came out of a hidden door and started graciously playing radio hits on the piano. He was shortly joined by three other "robot" performers, and they actually played quite well. They played for perhaps fifteen to twenty minutes, which was when the filled room was once again led elsewhere. The robot performers took a bow and left the stage as the audience shuffled off to the next area.
We were lead down several flights of stairs this time, all the way to the basement. The stairs themselves were overwhelmingly decorated as well. Random animals, patterns, graphics, and colours adorned the walls and stairs on the way down, lit up by LED's, backlights, and more mirrors. Down several floors of disorienting, but fascinating decorations until we reached the narrower-than-expected stage of the Robot Restaurant's main attraction.
The seats here were incredibly packed together, and we were sat elbow to elbow with other patrons. Across the stage was another area of seats, so the stage itself was in the centre of the venue. The seats were also equipped with a small table to put your food on.
Yes, you can purchase meals at this place. It is a restaurant after all, even if that's not what the attraction is about. The venue had carts of food and souvenirs available for purchase, and the vendors manning these carts were multilingual. As my friends and I knew enough Tagalog, we tried to guess if the people were from the Philippines. My friend struck asked one of the women operating the carts in Tagalog to buy something, and she switched from perfect Japanese to Tagalog in a heartbeat. When I tried to ask something in English, she switched again. My friend ended up buying a drink in a lightbulb-shaped container that was illuminated by a coloured LED. I ended up choosing not to buy anything because they were more expensive than I considered them to be worth.
The carts retreated and cleared the floor, and the show started with a background storyline projected onto the walls behind the seats. I can't remember what the story was, but I can say that it was a standard good versus bad storyline, almost akin to a Power Rangers episode. Even if I did remember the story, the show changes up once every three weeks or so, so they have probably changed up their performance since then. In any case, the show began and we were introduced to the performers as their characters.
Being single at the time, my friends and I ogled at the female performers. Their costumes were quite revealing, and we commented to each other at how fit they all were, obviously attracted to them. Please do note that these were human performers, not robots. The robots came out next, and they were big machines that resembled different creatures such as moths, dragons, and other monsters. The performance was broken down into acts, and all of them had lots of movement and grand displays of smoke and light shows. The women manoeuvring about the giant machines and performing dance routines showed the audience why they had such toned bodies.
One of the most memorable acts featured two large moving platforms in the shape of Kabuki actors with giant drums attached to them. The women were on these drums beating a very energetic rhythm as the two platforms circled the floor with extended parts that were close enough to clip audience members if they weren't paying attention. It was an hour or so of stimulus-heavy visuals and song performances, and some of them completely incoherent. The video below is a sample.
When the show ended, we were directed towards the stairs that we came down in once more. This time, we only had two floors to go up to get to the ground floor, where we exited back into the relative seediness of Kabukicho. I came out of the event dazed but pumped up by all the stimulus I experienced, and the lights of Kabukicho seemed tame in comparison to what was inside.
My friends and I reflected on the experience, and it became clear to me that if I expected anything out of the show, I would have been greatly disappointed. I realized that patrons of this event needed to turn their brain off in order to enjoy the show. One reason for this was that there were no actual robots in the show. Everything was operated by humans in the show, with no automated processes, which breaks the definition of "robot." Second, the storyline was really basic. Like I said, it was a standard good versus evil story with no clear continuation between the acts. This was understandable though, given that they change their performance so often. Lastly, everything was quite expensive for what they were. This made the Robot Restaurant a confirmed tourist trap by my standards.
That's what I have for the Robot Restaurant in Shinjuku's Kabukicho. Hopefully, you know what to expect, or what not to expect, if you do decide to go. As always, thanks for reading!
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